Chip — The Mastermind Behind Totally Offsides
After glaring problems at the end of last season bled over into this one, Ducks fans have long been suffering for a new coach. Definitely not in silence either. Go on Ducks Twitter and every other post is about Randy Carlyle. It’s now heard being chanted from the seats of Honda Center. Fans want a new coach at the helm and a dramatic death to the archaic system that is working less successfully than ever.
But, who should replace him? Coach Q? Eakins? Does Gritty have spare time? Ciara asked for my “expert” opinion, but since I am no expert, I’ll give you this suggestion.
Nubie.
I know you’re reading that name and thinking, “who the f is Nubie?” but trust me, you know him.
Remember the movie “Little Giants”?
Remember the “Annexation of Puerto Rico”? That’s Nubie. He’s the child mastermind that helped the misfit team led by Rick Moranis to victory over Ed O’Neill’s band of muscle-headed Cowboys. A child genius who also had the teachings of John Madden to guide him. That’s a pedigree worth pursuing.
I know that current complaint: old coach, old system. Okay, Nubie’s play-making workstation was made up of an Apple II and SNES. however, as old as it may be, Nubie’s system worked. It used the strength of the Giant’s smaller players to outsmart the bigger, stronger Cowboys. Sounds like the perfect parallel to the modern NHL to me.
Pick Nubie. It couldn’t get much worse.
Full disclosure, Nubie was played by my good friend and Totally Offsides podcast guest Mat McCurley. When I was asked to write this, the idea of nominating Nubie was too funny not to do.